I am going to complain to you now about working from home. But wait, hear me out.
Yes, first I will tell you that working from home is a pretty special gift. The fact that I got to take my work wherever I went meant that I got to visit Europe for a long stretch of time and reinvent myself as a person who wears lipstick sometimes. This was a very good thing.
Also right now I’m hard at work and brace yourselves for the outfit I am wearing at the moment because it looks like this:
Thick slipper socks of a lovely navy and yellow-striped pattern. My feet get cold when I work due to all of the putting my feet up on a stool and inactivity stuff.
Grey track pants that are so loose it’s like they’re not touching my body at all. But before you go thinking I’m not stylish you should probably know these babies have pockets and pockets are very on trend. Remember I was in Europe so I now know everything. These things also have a drawstring waist and if you are picturing Sylvester Stallone running up the stairs in Rocky I suppose that’s OK with me.
A Staves T-shirt from two years ago when I went to Wisconsin for the Eaux Claires music festival with three of my four boys. The Staves are these beautiful lady singers and if you’re hoping for a music suggestion I would say listen to “Facing West,” even though that’s not their coolest, it’s just a summer song that will make you wish you could sing. I wear this T-shirt to remind me that I am a cultural person.
A bright blue hooded sweatshirt over the entire ensemble. It’s cold for June. We all know this.
Not many people get to work all day in such a get-up so I do appreciate my good fortune. But here’s the other side of that.
I have clothing in my closet I visit sometimes. Skirts, blouses, dresses, sharp pants that mean business. These clothes were bought by a woman named me who told herself she was definitely going to wear them, even if it was just to the grocery store or whatever.
This woman named me was a big old pretender when she was shelling out money for that polka-dot skirt with pockets, that structured red dress straight out of some cocktail party with Sophia Loren playing my hotter best friend, that navy blazer she said she would wear with everything.
Only people with real places to be wear such lovely items and I have nowhere I have to be except sitting here in my living room wondering if I ate all the salt and vinegar chips. And also when I’m working I have no one to see me and marvel at my swirly skirts so where’s the fun in that?
Also I miss work friends. Work gossip. Work lunches. I don’t miss the actual work part of any of these things. But still, I know what I want. I want someone to just invite me to their office and tell me my presence is vitally important, that we will be dressing up for the day but then I will have three hours to hang out with the other employees and eat take-out Chinese food. I want to complain about the boss with them and have great anecdotes and make plans for after-drink cocktails on Friday.
Instead I’m just sitting here trying not to eat those chips and wondering if it’s time to drink a third cup of coffee and catching glimpses of myself in the mirror and wondering if I brushed my hair this morning.
See? I have lots to complain about I bet you feel terrible for judging me now.